A Choice?

I will start this post off by offering one more statistic:


Over 90% of babies diagnosed prenatally with Down syndrome are terminated

Abortion?

I don’t know about you, but my stomach literally turned when I read that fact. It just didn’t seem like it could be real…but sadly it is. I am not here to argue the basic premise of pro-life or pro-choice, because I do believe there are situations where woman should be given full control over their own bodies. What does bother me is that 90% had already made the choice to continue the pregnancy.

I make this assumption because a CVS to confirm diagnosis of Down syndrome is performed around 11-13 weeks, or an amniocentesis is performed around 15-18 weeks. If those women didn’t want the baby I doubt they would even be that far along in the pregnancy, or for that matter even be undergoing the tests in the first place.

So why if they had previously chosen life, do they suddenly decide that life wasn’t worth a chance anymore? Of course I can’t answer this question myself, but I do have a theory. Their image of the perfect family, perfect children, and perfect world has been invaded. Thoughts of anguish and sorrow have surrounded them. Preconceptions of what a child with Down syndrome will be ambush their conscience and reason, and they forget that first and foremost she will still be just a child…their child.

Of course, I am not going to pretend it is the easiest path to walk down. There will be unique hardships to face, but there will also be unique joys to experience...ones that will make the hours spent in physical and occupational therapy worth every minute. In fact, these therapies sessions can be a fun and wonderful bonding experience with your child, and the pride felt when she reaches a goal will be indescribable. Or so I’ve been told (read... check out Noah's Dad).

Perfection?

The thing I ask then is, what guarantee did these women ever have to believe their child would be perfect? If a doctor could tell them in advance that their child will have colic, severe allergies, juvenille diabetes, a lisp, a birthmark covering a large portion of the face/body, or be anything other than society’s view of "perfect", would they terminate the pregnancy? This may seem like a silly analogy, but isn’t that pretty much what they are doing? The doctor says Down syndrome, but what they hear she will never be be "perfect". I think they are afraid she will look different and never go to prom, go to college, get married, or be view society’s view of successful.

Therein lays the problem. Who says she will never do these things? These are imaginary limits placed on the Down syndrome community that are only bolstered by society’s perpetuation of them. I may be new to this world, but I am determined that my daughter will not be held back because people tell her she can’t do something. I realize that some of those things may not be the norm, but nothing is impossible. In the words of Ralph Waldo Emerson,

“To laugh often and much;

To win the respect of intelligent people

and the affection of children;

To earn the appreciation of honest critics

and endure the betrayal of false friends;

To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others;

To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child,

a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;

To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.

This is to have succeeded.”

[I do want to point out that I am ignoring some specific health concerns of babies with Down syndrome; for example, approximately 50% of babies will have some type of heart defect. However, according to my research and discussions with the doctor these conditions are either treatable by surgery, will just need to be monitored, or will resolve on their own. Again I ask though, what guarantee did these mothers have that any other child wouldn’t face some type of health issue? Also, there may be an argument of additional financial burden. However, I have found through my research that most states have sponsored early-intervention programs. In addition there are supplementary insurance options which are not always income based, or based on income levels well above what typical welfare-type programs are based on].